Case study: walking beside Kylie on her path to safety
Over two months, Kylie and her case worker at Pop In worked together to put in place safety plans and support services so that she was able to leave, without escalation from her abusive partner.
This scenario is a non-descript client case study that represents the challenges that our clients can face. Names, stories and situations have been altered to protect their identities.
Pop In's role
Women might approach Pop In at any stage of their path away from a violent or abusive relationship. Some might just be looking for information. They might not even be ready to ask for help - perhaps their partner is angry or controlling, but they’re not ready to see that as abuse.
Women might approach Pop In at any stage of their path away from a violent or abusive relationship. Some might just be looking for information. They might not even be ready to ask for help - perhaps their partner is angry or controlling, but they’re not ready to see that as abuse.
At the other end of the spectrum, women are ready to take their children and start over. They may have already left once or twice, and returned to the family home: it can take a woman several attempts to leave their violent or abusive partner before she moves on for good.
Sometimes small things can lead to big things. Monitoring a woman’s activities, for example, doesn’t always lead to domestic violence - but it’s a form of domestic abuse that our caseworkers help with every day. In short: Pop In is here to help women at every stage of their journey.
Every path is different
There are many different paths for a woman to take in order to get back on her feet. We’d like to tell you the story of a woman we recently helped at Pop In. We’ve changed some details to protect her anonymity, but this is a typical story of a woman from the Wingecarribee - your neighbour, your colleague, your friend.
Over two months, Kylie and her case worker at Pop In worked together to put in place safety plans and support services so that she was able to leave without escalation from her abusive partner.
A long journey starts with a small step
When Kylie first decided to visit Pop In, she had been dealing for some years with a partner who was coercive, controlling and abusive. He would monitor her movements and activities - even listen in on her conversations and read her text messages.
His behaviour had sometimes escalated to violence. He always apologised, and she always forgave.
For Kylie, a realisation that she needed help came when her partner locked her out of the house one evening. A friend intervened with a well-timed visit, discreetly taking Kylie to temporary safety.
Leaving home
After Kylie realised she was not safe from her abusive partner, it came as no surprise when he changed the locks to their shared home, where they had raised their four children. He refused to give her a key but told her she could still come and go, as long as he was there to let her in.
Kylie realised she needed to make other living arrangements as soon as possible. That’s when a friend told her about Pop In.
When she visited the Pop In cottage for the first time, Kylie was welcomed to a safe space. Kylie’s case worker worked with her to complete a DV Safety Assessment Tool. Her score indicated that she was at a high level of risk.
Putting a safety plan in place
Initially, together Kylie and her case worker put in place two safety plans:
how to maintain her safety while at home
how to safely leave in case of an emergency.
Next, we talked with Kylie about making a plan for her finances and her housing.
Financial counselling
At the time, Kylie’s income came only from her partner, who deposited an allowance into her account. When asked, he would also contribute to the children’s expenses.
Pop In referred Kylie to our financial counsellor, who helped her address her complex financial arrangements. We also provided a safe phone, as Kylie was sure her phone records were being monitored.
Help with housing
We were comforted to hear that Kylie had recently applied for a job, which would go a long way toward supporting her independence.
Pop In referred Kylie to St Vincent de Paul for support in applying for private rentals. We also helped her to get on the housing register with Argyle Housing.
Ongoing support
At first, Kylie and Pop In staff met face to face twice a week, and they checked in on the phone every day.
It took two months from the day she first walked into the cottage on 2 Mona Rd, but the outcome is positive - a safe place to stay with friends, and very little negative action from her partner.
“The risk of death or injury to a victim is greatest when leaving an abusive relationship or shortly thereafter.”
Kylie’s pathway to a new future is still unfolding. She continues to work to build her savings, in the hopes of one day renting a place of her own - with the help of St Vincent de Paul. She checks in with Pop In every week, just to let us know how things are going, and we will continue to support her as she navigates her path free from domestic violence and abuse.
It’s hard work, but she says it’s not as hard as walking on eggshells all the time.
Would you like more information?
If you know someone who is living with an abusive or violent partner, Pop In is here to help. While the Covid restrictions are in place, visits to 2 Mona Rd are by appointment only.
Phone us on 02 4872 1229 or get in touch from our online contact form.
